Each day that passes creates a bigger canyon in my heart. Minute to minute, hour to hour, your silence is chipping away at all the hopes and dreams I had for our family.
You recently said that if I was to leave that you would fight for me to stay. The time to do that is now. The time to pull out all of the stops is now. The time to throw away whatever insecurities and preconceived notions of what this should look like is now. By the time I decide to leave, it will be too late for any resuscitative actions. They will fall on deaf ears and a shattered heart that no amount of the right words could...
When Your Home Is a Battleground.
When your home is a battleground, you pull in the driveway in the evening and it doesn’t feel like the end of the day. It feels like the day is just getting started.
You have a plan in mind for how the night will go. What needs to get done and what you want to get done. You said your mantras and prayed your prayers. You listened to your podcasts. You convince yourself you can keep it all together tonight, no matter what gets thrown your way.
When your home is a battleground there’s territory claimed. The kitchen is yours’s. The front porch is his. There are unspoken agreements. He gets the bathroom early evening; you...
As the song goes, “I’m dreaming of a white Christmasss…,” but in my mind, I am currently picturing white sand and blue water. Unfortunately, the holidays can be a stressful time for many even though it is supposed to be a time for joy and celebrating the birth of our savior. It’s a time with lots of extra expenses and you still have all your usual expenses too. And the all too familiar Covid throws another grinchy wrench in it all. Basically, holiday stress + pregnancy hormones = recipe for Level 5 meltdown.
After a disagreement between my husband and I one evening, I found myself sitting on the couch and wishing we were back in Hawaii. We sort of...
I volunteer. I do Pilates. I run. Generally speaking, I look like a fairly put together person. I have a decent job. I’m well-spoken. If we met at Java Mama, a BREC park, or an LSU watch party, you’d have no clue that I had been going home to a physically and emotionally abusive relationship for nearly two years. Through countless counseling sessions and conversations with friends and family, I got myself and my daughter out.
Recently, on the Betrayal Trauma Recovery podcast, I heard a guest say “an isolated victim is a controlled victim.” I’ve now realized the severely awful times were the times I was isolating myself from others. I was kicked, choked, slapped, called a sl*t, etc....
Yup, at my house, my husband and I have a television in our bedroom. We are "those" people. Fun fact: All of the money we were gifted with when we got married... yeah, we spent it on a massive TV. And guess what? We LOVE it!
There. I said it.
If I am being completely honest, my husband and I are from opposite ends of the planet. He is the epitome of an outdoorsman. He lives for anything hunting or fishing related. Me, not so much. My passion lies with the arts. I love writing, music, theater, reading... you get the drift. I'm sure you can imagine how funny we look, trying to plan a date night together. An odd mesh of going...
Around Baton Rouge
Following The Pink and Gold Sparkly Road :: How Joining a...
The Pink and Gold Sparkly Road :: How Joining a Local Dance Krewe Enhanced my Life
Three years ago, I was recovering from a devastating...
