I absolutely LOVE Christmas time. Yes, I am one of those crazy Christmas decorators who have their decorations up before Thanksgiving (gasp … another elf apparently bites the dust). I love everything that the holiday season brings to my family and having decorations around just makes me HAPPY! Shoot, I’d have that beautiful lit tree up all year long if I wasn’t such a clutter freak. Celebrating Christmas with all the wonderful components of it (baking, decorating, gift giving, spending time with family, going to church, etc) is the highlight of my year.
My cut back on my children’s gifts from “Santa” all began about 7 years ago. Back then, I had a 3 and a 1 year old. Christmas morning of 2007, I was smacked in the face with a reality check. My 3 year old had been opening gifts for over an hour. Like really an hour … and that was fast opening too. Why was it taking so long? What in the world did I buy that kid? How many presents did he receive from Santa? Did Santa actually sneak in my house and ADD to the presents I had already bought?? Surely he must have. It was SO.MANY.GIFTS for one tiny human. After approximately 73 minutes, my three year old turned around, looked at me with a very nervous smile, and said “Momma, can I stop opening my presents so I can play?” Oh dear … that just happened.
Time stood still in that moment. My mind was swirling with all the shopping trips that began in August. The stockpiling of gifts in every nook and cranny in my house, hiding from my kids AND my husband. The times I wondered, “Does he have enough presents? Oh, what’s one more!” as I wandered aimlessly around Target or Toys-R-Us. Oh my GRACIOUS. I was breaking the bank on all of the toys that I bought knowing he’d love every last one of them. I was raising my child to come to know that Christmas was a time of PRESENTS!!! AND LOTS OF THEM!!! Well, yeah, I wanted him to understand that Santa brings good boys and girls presents for Christmas, but I also wanted him to know the deeper, much deeper meaning of Christmas. It became apparent to me that Christmas morning, as I sat in my robe sipping cold hot chocolate, that I was failing my kids by the over abundance of presents. Something had to change.
As the next Christmas season approached, I was vigilant about finding a way to keep the CHRIST in Christmas, as we are a Christian family who attends church regularly. I read a blog I found one Saturday morning that pointed me in a new direction. I would give each child of mine 3 gifts for Christmas. Jesus was born on Christmas and received gifts from the three wise men. 3 gifts … on Jesus’ birthday … perfection in my mind, as cliché as some might think. So I set out finding the three most perfect gifts that holiday season for my two boys … 1. something that they wanted, 2. something that they needed, and 3. something that would surprise the heck out of them. It wasn’t about how much money I spent on these items, it was about the quality and thought put into finding that gift that I KNEW my children would cherish and love for months to come.
That Christmas morning was everything I had hoped it to be and more. The boys absolutely loved their gifts, we got to spend so much more time together, and my clean freak momma bonus … a much smaller mess to clean up. Score!!! Our family has chosen this method of Christmas gift giving since then and my boys know no other way. Gone are the days of endless purchasing of nonsense, filler, cheap toys to make the tree look fuller. Gone are the days of hiding all of my Saturday splurges. Gone are the days of the million mile pileup of toys in my living room from 2 hours of opening gifts. Our Christmas days now consist of more snuggling, more reading Christmas books, more cooking and baking, more one on one time with each child, more gratefulness, and more time to spend with each other. And in the end, isn’t that what Christmas is all about? Not presents that never end or spending $500 dollars on each child so they can have “enough” that chilly December morning.
Is this the right way for every family out there? I doubt it. I have gotten the stink eye a few times when I have told someone our gift giving tradition. I’ve been called a Scrooge. But every family is different and we all choose our battles. Keeping Christmas Holy was my battle, and I’d say that I finally have this battle won!
We decided to do the same thing this year. It was a decision based upon my son’s very pricey Christmas list. Most items were over $100. He knew Santa would bring him the $400 Star Wars Deathstar Lego set that we failed as parents to provide at his birthday a month earlier. We informed our son that Santa does have to follow age guidelines on the presents he hands out, and he’s still too young for the Deathstar. We then discussed this new tradition. My older child is completely fine with it… BUT after I ordered her three presents, I came across a gold necklace and bracelet that I got when I was her age. I want to gift that to her, but it would be exceeding the gift limit.
My husband and I have done this for our children since my son was born New Years of 2009. Christmas 2011 we were struggling with doing Santa or not. We struggled from conviction that we didn’t want to take the focus off of Christ! So, a friend had mentioned the 3 gifts. I immediately adopted that idea! We do a birthday cake for Jesus on Christmas Eve night and then they get 3 gifts on Christmas morning. Way to keep Christ in Christmas!!!! Thanks for your post!
This year we are doing 4 gifts: something you want, something you need, something you wear, and something you read. It’s been hard for me to just buy them one want item but I’m sticking to it. They are still young so I’m going for this to catch on and continue. We still do the elf and Santa but I’m incorporating Jesus into it as much as I can right now. I’m excited to downplay the gifts this year. We did buy a trampoline for both of them, so there is one large surprise gift. It’s a start at least. We are trying to focus more on family experiences together and not so much on gifts.
I love this idea this is the way me and my husband so our children and I truly believe they learn to appreciate the TRUE meaning of Christmas!!!!!!
We do 4, something you want , something you need, something to wear, and something to read.
Great post. We give our kids just a few things too. No matter what toys they have they always go back to crayons, scissors, glue sticks, and paper so why buy all the expensive stuff? As a military family we move too often to have so much stuff. Even though we try we still realized during this last move that we still have too much stuff so I’m purging again post move. (sorry moving company)
I’ve also read you can give, something they want, something they need and something to nurture their soul (a gift that feeds them spiritually). That’s hard to come up with but the post is at http://www.tolovehonorandvacuum.com. Great blog for Christian women. Thanks for keeping Christ in Christmas and making people think about this Katie. I love that you shared that you are a Christian. So many are scared to put that out there these days.
Thank you all so so so much!!! Seeing everyone mostly agreeing with my post makes my heart HAPPY!!!! Great ideas everyone! Love the comments here!
And Liz, I’m not scared one bit! My heart compels me to speak the truth…whether it is about my family or about my Savior! Thank you for your sweet words! 🙂
Best idea ever! Thanks
My little ones are a girl that is almost 5 and a boy that just turned 3.
We do the general rule of something they want (a toy), something they need (stocking hat, mittens and/or socks), something to wear and something to read. These gifts are from my husband and me.
The Santa gifts they get are the stocking stuffers (toothbrush, decorative band aids, a small toy or book, etc) and 1 other gift, typically a toy. This seems to have worked well with our budget and the kids are not overwhelmed with gifts. 🙂
Merry Christmas!
Oh sweet Katie- my long lost soul companion – I am a teacher who taught jr high special ed & loved those darlings 🙂 I had no clue it was to prepare me for our sweet son -Joseph Cash. He has special needs as well! I have a daughter Jordan Lynn! Yes yes yes to this idea! Loved it and have always stuck to 3 gifts and the want, need, wear, read to guide the gift choices. You are an inspiration. I am thrilled to find this blog. If I am ever in your area or you in mine – New Braunfels, TX – we live 2blocks from schlitterbahn. I would hug you & tell you that you are awesome! Keep up the great work 🙂
Merry Christmas