The other day, as I dropped the last kid off in carpool, I switched the radio from our kid-friendly station to the nostalgic sounds of the 90’s. And as Bush came blaring through my speakers, I couldn’t help but burst into laughter! Lyrics I used to belt out with the angst and anguish only a teen can, have suddenly taken on new meaning as a mom! Y’all, EVERY song is applicable to motherhood! I present to you:
90’s Lyrics That Totally Apply to Motherhood.
I’m never alone, I’m alone all the time.
– Glycerine , Bush
Can you feel me? No privacy in the bathroom, feeling isolated from the world at times.
Save tonight, fight the break of dawn.
– Save Tonight , Eagle Eye Cherry
Prayed every morning by those tired mamas needing just 5 more minutes, PLEASE!
She doesn’t own a dress, her hair is always a mess.
– Meet Virginia , Train
Anyone know this kid? Usually dressed in a tattered superhero costume and rain boots …
Will I choose water over wine?
– Drive , Incubus
Nope. No today!
Holds her hair back as she screams.
– Meet Virginia , Train
But seriously, tantrums anyone? Tiny people, big emotions.
I want a perfect body.
– Creep , Radiohead
What? You’re saying a diet of kid scraps & ice cream won’t do that for me?
Tryin’ to catch me riding dirty.
– Ridin’ , Chamillionare
Why do they always poop at the most inconvenient times? During carpool? Poop. Ten minutes late for church? Poop. New shirt, Ma? Poop.
You can hide beside me for awhile; and I won’t tell ‘em your name.
– Name , Goo-Goo Dolls
In solidarity with all the moms of shy littles out there. I will be your safe space, even if it means you’re hiding under my skirt …
I don’t even care.
– 1979 , Smashing Pumpkins
4:59pm “Can I watch Pepa Pig? Can I watch Pepa Pig? Can I watch Pepa Pig?” *pours a drink*
And I don’t think I have ever seen a soul so in despair, so if you want to talk the night through, guess who will be there?
– Roll to Me , Del Amitri
Night terrors. Let’s work out all the possible scenarios as to why there are actually no monsters in your room …
If I were someone else would this all fall apart?
–Real World , Matchbox 20
For those moments when you feel the weight of being the answer to all the questions, the solution to all the problems. A reminder that we have a tribe for a reason.
Sorry I’m not home right now, I’m walking into spiderwebs. So leave a message and I’ll call you back.
– Spiderwebs , No Doubt
Can I get an amen? If you want an actual conversation, call me after bedtime.
Break to ya crib change your clothes once more.
– Summertime , DJ Jazzy Jeff ft. Fresh Prince
Was I adequately warned of ALL THE POOP that would be involved?! And why don’t I ever have enough spare onesies??
If you could only see the way she loves me, you would understand.
– If You Could Only See , Tonic
Nothing can prepare you for the adoring look from your wee babe and how it will rip your heart out in all the best ways.
Try and play the role and yo the whole crew’ll act up.
– Jump Around , House of Pain
Anyone try grocery shopping with more than one kid? No, just me? Okay. *Disaster on aisle 3*
You get her name and number and then you feelin’ real mellow.
– OPP , Naughty by Nature
Making mom friends is hard! It’s almost harder than dating! Did we really click or am I reading too much into this? Wanna do coffee? Can we hang out on the regular? WILL YOU BE MY FRIEND??
The way you look across a crowded room and a see the way that light attaches to a girl.
– A Long December , Counting Crows
Another one of those moments when the beauty of this kid that is yours, makes you stop & give thanks for all they bring to your life. Take a breath, let it sink in, memorize this moment.
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.
– All Star , Smash Mouth
Mom brain anyone?
A lonely mother gazing out of her window.
– Waterfalls , TLC
Motherhood can be hard and even isolating at times. If you can relate, hang in Mama, it will get better!
Say my name, say my name.
– Say My Name , Destiny’s Child
And if you say my name ONE. MORE. TIME. I will change it to Princess Conzuella Banana Hammock! I wonder if Bey has the same thoughts these days?
Little precious has a natural obsession for temptation but he just can’t see.
– Waterfalls , TLC
Surely I’m not the only one with a kid hosting an obsession for electrical outlets, climbing towers, and sharp pointy objects?
Seems like I should be getting somewhere, somehow I’m neither here nor there.
– Runaway Train , Soul Asylum
I mean. EVERY. DANG. DAY. What have I accomplished today? Nothing, absolutely nothing.
Lying on the floor, I’ve come undone.
– Undone, Weezer
5:01pm on a Friday when you get the text from the husband, “Hey Babe, I may have to work a little late today.”
Bye, bye, bye!
– Bye, Bye, Bye , N’SYNC
Because you’ve asked them to put their shoes on 475 times and they still haven’t. Walk out that door, Mama. Bye-bye!