The Aloof Days of Summer

The Aloof Days of Summer

Is it just me or does everyone’s teen get a little extra during summer break? I mean, we’re not far into June, and already there is a dramatic increase in yawns, eye rolling and deep, drawn-out sighs. Really?

Thinking about this, I googled teens and summer attitudes, and lo and behold, this is a thing! Countless medical and therapy sites offered headlines like, “Navigating Your Teen Through the Summer,” “Why Summer Can Be Tough on Teen Mental Health,” and “No, Your Teen Doesn’t Hate You. It’s Just Summer.” I always feel better knowing a particular challenge is not unique to our household, so this did offer some comfort. However, what in the world do we do about this?

As for us, I start planning summer in March! Before school is even finished, I’m scouring sites for activities and projects, so it’s not for lack of trying. Last year, my teen got a summer job tutoring at a local company. While we thought this job would last one summer, it turns out he’s good at tutoring and absolutely loves the independence he gets from working. He’s kept the job for a year now and is continuing to work this summer.

However, even with all of the confidence boosting and sense of purpose the job creates, he’s still…bored.

So, this summer, he’s attending an ACT prep boot camp, and he’s participating in a medical shadowing program. He’s doing summer academic work for next year’s classes, taking courses on Khan Academy and spending time out with friends. We’re planning a family vacation, and we’ll squeeze in a few road trips. All of these activities will hopefully while away the time for him. Maybe he’ll even learn something in spite of himself, but there are still those downtime moments when he retreats to his room like an elusive Bigfoot and stays up entirely too late. Yes, I stayed up way too late as a teen, so I can’t judge him for that, but does anything good ever really happen after midnight in the life of a teen?

It’s ironic that in a world where teens are over-scheduled and on the go throughout the school year, the summer seems too quiet for them. As a grown woman, I crave downtime, but do we push teens so hard throughout the academic year that summer freedom feels overwhelming? It certainly seems so. And, if you’re like me, hearing those deep breaths and seeing those eye rolls sends stress rippling through you.

How do you help your teen relax and enjoy summer while also balancing social activities and maintaining your own 8-to-5? I’m certainly open to suggestions!