Today has not been a good day. There is no silver lining. It isn’t your fault or any one thing. It is the build-up of so many little things.
I’m worn out and drained. I need a break from the constant scheduling of afternoon activities, meal prep, laundry, and daily household chores. I’m sorry I was passive and snapped at you when you tried to talk to me. I know you aren’t a mind reader and instead of explaining to you that I’m overwhelmed and frustrated, I decided to be irritated.
Instead of being so very grateful for everything you do for our family, I chose to focus on all the things I wished you had done today.
There are days when I am just tired of being the chauffeur, chef, co-worker, and housekeeper, that there isn’t anything left for you. Once the children are in bed, I just want to be selfish and focus on my own needs. I crave my own space. On these days I often realize too late that I didn’t even hug or acknowledged you with a thank you and a kiss.
Truth is, on those days when I’m hyper-focused on my do-to list the “good wife/partner” role gets pushed to the side. I’m so far from perfect, but I am so grateful that at my worst, you find a way to see the good in me. You reassure me that there is no need to apologize. You give me grace. You always find a way to make me smile and remind me that we are in this for the long haul – together.
You provide a safe space.
Parenthood is work – rewarding, but work nonetheless. It tests boundaries, pushing one to the brink sometimes. At the end of a hard day – the time I spend with you is the best part of the day. You make me feel so loved and appreciated. You make me laugh. You provide me with a safe space to vent. I know I’m not the best at telling you, but I am beyond grateful to have a partner like you. A partner that doesn’t run when the going gets tough but rather embraces me without conditions and the life we have created together.