Balancing holiday events can be brutal. School concerts and sports and vacations, work parties, spending money, playing Santa and somehow holding onto our sanity seems almost impossible. And let’s face it, mom guilt is real. As if we needed more pressure on the holidays, most of us face mom guilt it as though it were the high school mean girl that’s out to ruin us. We compare ourselves and we compete with social media photos as though they are capturing reality in a perfect picture, and then we are left feeling inadequate, wondering how much damage we are doing to our kids in the long run. I’m right there with you, and I’m here to share so tips on how to defeat that “mean girl” mom guilt in your life during the holiday season. After all, none of us want to turn into the Grinch or Scrooge for our families, and it is indeed possible to remain a happy elf.
Here are some of helpful tips on defeating mom guilt this holiday season
Lists. Lists. Lists.
Fear of the unknown can cause stress and unnecessary anxiety. Working from a list will force you to extract your to-do’s from your brain and write them down. Here are a few examples of lists that can be helpful. Trust me, there’s a feeling of accomplishment and positivity when you start checking the “done” boxes!
- Kids event days, times, and supplies needed. For example, Monday is crazy hat day and Tuesday is mismatch socks. Make a list and prep these items over the weekend before.
- Holiday parties, what you’re wearing, what you’re bringing.
- Traveling? Make a list of what you need to bring – everything from printed boarding passes to toothpaste.
- Holiday presents. All too often we forget about the school librarian or art teacher, or our son’s new girlfriend, or our pets who are anxiously waiting for Santa’s treats. Who do you need to buy for? What’s your spending limit? This is a very quick and easy way to see what you have left to get and how much you’ve spent. And if you have a little extra to spend, get a couple of “just in case” gifts for those people that you forgot to list. It happens to all of us!
Sometimes it should be about YOU.
As moms, we tend to coordinate and over-coordinate for everyone else – don’t forget that you have a Christmas stocking too. Take advantage of those gift sets you get for everyone else – you know, the bath bombs and pampering cozy socks, and peppermint bark – and get yourself some too. If you sacrifice for everyone else, you forget that you need to stop and enjoy the simpler things during the season.
Enjoy the moment
From kids choir concerts, to local holiday events, to seeing family that you haven’t seen since … well, the last time you checked their social media pages… the holidays fly by and we forget that each moment is something we will not get back. Your baby’s first Christmas, your kids making presents and ornaments, your funny-looking fruit loaf that you attempted to make for the first time – all of these are precious to us and our families. Put the phone down, turn the electronics off, turn that holiday music up, and let yourself live in the moment. Instill a spirit of living-in-the-moment with your family. Take some cocoa bombs and add extra marshmallows, then wrap some presents and have some laughs. Make memories that last a lifetime and let that mom-guilt melt away.
About Kimberly Wigglesworth
Kimberly is a wife, mom, friend, community leader, and business professional. She’s a Baton Rouge native, third-generation LSU grad, and a self-proclaimed champion of both mastering chaotic schedules and creating coocoo jingles (mostly about burps, butts, and farts) to laugh kids out of tantrums. She has a closet full of 6” heels to remind her of pre-Covid life and has recently invested in some very nice house slippers. She enjoys playing card games with her husband and jamming to throwback songs from the 90’s, hosting neighborhood game nights, and spending time with her family and friends. Coffee is her crutch and comedy is her prescribed medicine for life’s insanity.