Self Care and a Healthier Relationship

Anyone else feel that life gets put in cruise control after kids? This cruise control is not taking us anywhere romantically with our significant other either. More like a quick run to McDonald’s or a night of chasing kids before they go to bed. After having our first child, I started to feel this lack of ‘alone time’ with my husband. It didn’t get much easier as we added two more to the pack.Self Care & a Healtheir Relationship

We tried to make an effort for at least one date night, aka, a quick dinner run, at least once every 2 months. For the majority of our anniversaries, dinner was at home with kids. The date of our anniversary doesn’t make it easy for a babysitter seeing that it falls around Memorial Day weekend. So there is usually no babysitter or one of the kids happens to be sick. Go figure. As parents, we choose to take the bench when it comes to our self care as a couple. We have always felt “okay” just by getting that chance to go to dinner, without kids, from time to time.

And we were on our way.

This was until we chose to get away for the night. Note here: Not for the evening, for the ENTIRE night. As we left all three kids with my in laws, a bit of anxiety fell over us as we drove towards New Orleans. The anxiety wasn’t because we thought our in laws were incapable of taking care of our kids, it was the thought of our kids running the in laws ragged. A few calls and texts saying everyone was good allowed us to breathe as we checked into our room. 

Self Care & a Healtheir Relationship
Looking so refreshed at our rehearsal dinner. Obviously got lots of rest before kids 😉

For the night and the next morning, it would just be us. This consisted of dinner where we could talk to each other and not worry about keeping kids under control. Following dinner, we walked around New Orleans and popped into a few quaint bars along the way back to our hotel. We did not have to worry about rushing home to put kids to bed or to relieve anyone keeping our kids. We were actually able to enjoy each other without having to rush through it all.

Waking up the next morning to a brunch date and another walk around New Orleans just topped it off. Maybe it was the fact that I hadn’t slept that long since before kids, or the fact that I woke up to just my husband laying next to me without another little body sandwiched in between us. Having my husband all to myself truly made every second count.

Find the time for self care as a couple.

Self Care & a Healtheir Relationship
One of my favorites from our wedding.

My eyes have now been opened to how important self care is for us as a couple. It is easy to lose ourselves during the chaotic moments of parenting. A lot of the time, you have to shift from being romantic to more of a friend or roommate. I learned this over the past few years when things seemed to get more hectic that usual. Yes, those dinner dates are still great and help us get through the busy times of the year. Having an entire night without kids is just a different story. I promise you, I won’t be waiting another 8 years to do it.

Have you been able to get away like this?

Clair is a former science teacher turned stay at home mommy to 3 kids, Ryleigh (6), Brady (5) and Chloe (1). She is originally from Mississippi and moved to Louisiana after meeting her husband at Mississippi College. She can’t imagine living anywhere else now. The culture here in Louisiana is the best: from the great food to cheering on the LSU Tigers. Her background in science has her loving to incorporate all things science while at home with her kids. This has led her to the world of blogging! Her blog, The Sprouting Minds, includes all things ‘mommy’ as well as those engaging kid activities. She hopes she can spread the love of science to other families as well as encourage mothers along the way.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here