Anxiety. For the longest time, most have taken that word and shoved it so far into the ground to where it was almost non-existent. You can take the word out of the picture, but the anxiety is still there. There is no better time to talk about self care and love than the month of February.
Why does it have to be a stigma?
Oh the joys of social media. It can be used for good as well as for bringing out the bad. We live in a world that craves for perfection. And yes, I can now admit that I am a struggling perfectionist. When you place someone who craves perfection, seeing others with lives perfect causes them to spiral downward a little. No one is perfect, and it is pretty much darn impossible to be perfect.
A mom with kids who never fight … yea right. A child who eats everything and never once complains … quite possible, but rare. Social media places a false description on what is and should be expected. This is more evident to those who strive to be perfect. A person who is quite content with their life will not see the perfection on social media as something to be sought after.
So when it comes to anxiety, it makes one feel less perfect. Anxiety is not ‘real’ when looking at the majority of social media. Everyone seems to always have their lives together. No anxiety allowed. It took me 2 years to realized that I was struggling with anxiety. The perfectionist in me would not allow for it.
When you know, you know.
I have been asked before ‘How did you know that you had anxiety / depression?’ Well, I just knew. I was not happy and things that should not stress me out, stressed me out. Crying for no reason happened a lot. Putting on a fake smile and taking life as it was dealt in front of others was a part of my daily routine. I could not let anyone know how I truly felt because well, it meant I wasn’t perfect.
I wanted to be the perfect wife and mother. The belief that having anxiety would only make me less of mother or wife haunted my thoughts. Until it was just too much. The moment where I felt life was over when my toddler spilled a bowl of goldfish was when I knew I needed to seek help. I mean yes, some days we just need to cry as a parent. I knew this was more than that. And when I did, I am very thankful for friends and family who were there.
Finding the help YOU deserve.
Once I knew I needed help, I made a point to get it. This is probably one of the best things I have ever done for myself. Yes, seeking a therapist is the best self care move I have ever EVER made. It has made all the difference in the world to have that one person who you can talk to and who will not have any judgement. He / she is there for you. I can’t tell you how much better I have been since seeing a therapist.
I can tell as difference as can my family. Now, do days still get tough? Well yea, of course! Being a parent is not a ride on the merry-go-round. I can say, though, that I am able to handle life better and with a real smile on my face these days.
If you ever feel that you are alone when it comes to anxiety, please know that you are not! I was in that very same place and can tell you from personal experience you are NEVER alone. Find someone to talk to and push that anxiety down into the ground for your sake and not for the sake of perfection.