I Don’t Want To Multi-Task Anymore

Multi-tasking. Outside of laundry and cleaning bathrooms, it is the bane of my existence. I hate multi-tasking. So why do I? I do this out of necessity, not out of love for it. I truly wish I had more time in the day – more time to clean, fold clothes, prepare meals, prepare for the next day, cuddle with both of the kids at separate times, play with them, sit down to eat a meal, spend more time building robots and playing pretend with the toddler, exercising … and the list goes on and on. I wish I could sit down and have a conversation with my husband in the evening, giving him all of my attention and energy – even if it is just for five minutes.

The reality of it is, I have to multi-task.

I have to hold the baby in a sling while I cook dinner so she will nap. I have to feed her while the toddler is in the bathtub, making it impossible for me to play with his sharks and boats, even when he begs me to. I sometimes rush to bathe the toddler so that I can feed and bathe baby and get her to bed. I sometimes push the kids off on my husband in the evening so I can cook dinner, do laundry, and answer work emails. I hate telling my child no when he asks me to play with or hold him. I hate telling him no because I don’t have time. 

I hope my family knows that I am multi-tasking out of necessity.

I multi-task for survival. It is not fun for me. I wish I could give 100% of my attention to one task/one person at a time, but there just isn’t enough time in the day. I am trying to give my husband and the kids more of my attention – more one-on-one time. I pray that they understand I have lots to do – too much to do most of the time. And I pray that they don’t hold that against me. It’s exhausting and there are plenty of nights I ask myself if I did enough.

DID I DO ENOUGH?!

Did I reassure the kids they are loved, safe and that we are proud of them? Did I give my husband and the kids enough attention? Did I give my toddler enough space to make mistakes and learn from them? Did I allow him to be independent (as much as a three-year-old can)?  Did my family suffer because I had other things to take care of? Did I engage the kids enough during our drives to and from daycare and once we got home? Do they feel loved?

I don’t know. I can only try again tomorrow and pray they see that my “busyness” is for them.

Amy Craft-Peltier
Amy was born and raised in Lafayette, LA. She attended UL Lafayette and graduated with a bachelor’s degree in Health Information Management. Amy works remotely for a healthcare company based out of Lafayette, LA. She and her husband Toby have two children - a rambunctious, loving boy and a sweet baby girl - and one dog. When she isn't working or spending time with her family, Amy enjoys quiet trips to Target, good food and, depending on the time of the day, coffee or wine.

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