As I sit down for the first time today after work, school, gym practice, dance practice, hair washing, dinner and night time routine, I question if I am letting all of the little things get in the way of the big things.
Mommin’ is not an easy thing for any of us; there is always something to do, something we forgot and something we can’t remember that we forgot. I worry that in all of the struggles of the day to day routines that I am forgetting to teach my children to be strong, proud, kind, opinionated, and most of all, happy with themselves. My daughters are seven and five and polar opposites of each other. My oldest is gentle and soft spoken, she loves to read and wear pretty dresses, whereas my youngest is loud and rough, but with a smile that could melt your heart. With them both being so different, I have learned that I have to speak to them each in different ways,]. I have to find their “Love Language” if you will. The way I teach my oldest one a lesson may not work the same for my youngest, and for a busy mom that has been a tough pill to swallow.
One night on our way home from dancing, my oldest started to tell me a story about what she learned and my youngest started to interrupt her with her version of the story. That resulted in a screaming match in the backseat. I handled the situation with pulling over about a block from our house and making each one of them tell their story while the other one listened and gave them their full attention and then having to apologize for interrupting and yelling. I’m not going to lie to you …. I didn’t want to pull over, we had just spent 2 hours at dancing, it was 8pm at night and I was exhausted. I wanted to yell “STOP IT RIGHT NOW” and continue driving home and drag myself into a bubble bath. However it dawned on me that this is one of those “teaching moments” we all hear so much about. One of those moments where you have to take the time to STOP and use those moments no matter what is going on to teach them.
Has anyone written an honest book on parenting? One that talks about what to do when your kid screams “mom are you pooping?” in a public bathroom, or they tell their Kindergarten teachers that my mom’s favorite thing to do is drink wine? Someone hand me one of those books and I will give you all of my money and a big ole kiss on the cheek. I always reference raising kids as “The Good, The Bad, and The Crazy!” With all the things that happen in a seven day period, it is almost easy to forget that we are teaching, growing, healing, loving, and keeping tiny humans alive. We deserve medals and a loud applause every time we leave the house on time, but since that seems unlikely, know that I think you are AMAZING and no matter what you feel like you are forgetting or not doing well enough, there are thousands of moms just like you. Together we are growing the world into a better place.
Remember to take time to snuggle, teach, cry, breath, and hide in the closet while eating a chocolate bar (we all do it, I SWEAR). Skip a day of dance practice or karate, wash their hair tomorrow, stay an extra 10 minutes in the bubble bath. Don’t let all the hundred little things get in the way of being the amazing strong mom that you are. The little things will not matter 40 years from now, but YOU and the things you teach them will.