What is Your Breaking Point?

Unless you’ve been under a rock (pun not intended), you’ve heard about or seen the incident between Chris Rock and Will Smith. Let’s pause … I, nor Red Stick Mom, is condoning or endorsing physical altercations. We do not know what prompted Mr. Smith to approach the stage and hit Mr. Rock. We were all seated comfortably in our homes watching it unfold. However, what we do know is that the internet erupted with #teamwill and #teamrock. We know that friends became foes over differing opinions. We know that many people cheered while others clutched their pearls. We also know that we all have a breaking point.

Yes, all of us do. We all have triggers and our “enough is enough” moments. The important thing to remember is to know those triggers and try to avoid them. But can we really avoid them all of the time? Have you ever been an exasperated mom because you’ve asked your kids to do the same thing over and over? Or maybe you’re totally frustrated because your husband brought home 1-ply bathroom tissue again instead of 2-ply. Whatever the case may be, do you know your breaking point? I know mine and sometimes I mess up. Sometimes I do not remove myself from situations quickly enough. Sometimes that voice in my head that tells me not to react just doesn’t speak quickly or loudly enough. And still, sometimes I hear her loud and clear, but I just have to get my point across. Has this ever resulted in my striking someone? Yes. Yet, I am still a wonderful person of decent character. But if you’ve never had the opportunity to “break bread with me,” you just may decide I am awful. On the contrary, I have also been like Chris Rock and hailed out some insults hidden as jokes. I’ve been both of these men. And more than likely, you may have been too. So what’s the difference? We aren’t celebrities and the world isn’t watching.

So as we attempt to push away from the least important fact from the 2022 Academy Awards, let us all try to identify our breaking point. Let us all remember that while we can choose how we act, we cannot choose how others will react. Unfortunately, sometimes that may be physical. It’s also a really good time to acknowledge that words do in fact hurt, in some ways more than punches. Many times, those words come at you like salt in an open wound, and our breaking point is exposed.

I am not here to judge Chris Rock or Will Smith. They are not my peers. And even then, it is not my right to convict them for their choices. I just hope that if this momma is ever in a situation of having her breaking point exposed, someone will love me enough to guide me back to a safe space. I also hope that those around me are compassionate enough to not crucify me and nullify all of my good deeds because my vulnerability led to something outside of my character.

Finally, I encourage each of us (especially moms) to take those breaks when we need them. Speak to your counselor when you need it. Have people in your circle that can help talk you off that ledge. And always remember that second chances are necessary. Especially, when you’ve reached your breaking point.

D'Andra Bradford Odom grew up in Jonesboro, LA. She swore to her parents that she would never live in Arkansas, Louisiana, Mississippi, or Texas. However, after completing a cooperative education assignment with IBM in Rochester, MN, she bravely returned to Louisiana to plant her roots. D’Andra earned a Bachelors from Grambling State University in Grambling, LA and a Masters from the rival school Southern University and A&M College in Baton Rouge, LA. However, the rivalry only lasts for one Saturday in November, the Saturday after Thanksgiving. D’Andra has a strong passion for public policy, social justice, and cooking. Therefore, it is no surprised that this self-proclaimed foodie met her husband, Chef Brandon Odom while trying a new spot, and ultimately co-founded Odom’s Kitchen (eatwithodoms.com). Together D’Andra and Brandon have two amazing children, Josiah and Corrinne. Josiah is the gentle and compassionate little gentleman. While Corrinne marches to the beat of her own drum. One of the things she loves most about being in Louisiana is providing her children with access to three living great-grandparents. Additionally, D’Andra and Brandon enjoy entertaining friends and family through food and laughs. She considers it an added bonus to be able to share and interact with other moms in the area. As it turns out this North Louisiana native found her roots through love in South Louisiana. A badge she wears proudly.

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