It is past time that someone says it, so excuse me while I stand on top of my soapbox and scream it from my backyard: “Are you a CHEERLEADER for the other women in this world or are you a RIVAL?”
Will you help build the next generation of strong, proud, kind amazing women or will you help another decade of women hide their talents and passion for fear of being bullied and tormented? I have so many mixed emotions and feelings about this topic, but one opinion always stands out: SUPPORT your fellow woman, especially if she is your friend.
I want to ask you a question here (and please answer honestly). How often have you been in a conversation with other females and they (or you) begin to speak poorly about another woman that you all know, and may even be “friends” with? The topic can start with a “did you see what so and so is selling now?” or “did you see her new Instagram post, who does she think she is?” I can guarantee you we have all been there, We have all either been in that conversation, started that conversation or we are the person being talked about in that conversation. If you want to know who your real friends are, I dare you, to start a business or write a blog and see how many people like your page, or share your posts. You will either be pleasantly surprised or a little hurt.
In the past year I can name seven casual friends who have started a blog or business. Now, I am going to be honest and tell you I have only purchased items from 2 of them; however, I have liked EVERY single Facebook business page I have been invited to like and shared their posts. In no way am I telling you to purchase every single thing that your friends start to sell, but liking their page or their Instagram picture is FREE. It cost $0 to show someone that you see what they are doing and you acknowledge it and will help in any way you can.
My little girls are 8 and 5, their self-esteem is balancing on the edge of a very tall cliff. They take every single thing someone says to them to heart. For example, my 5 year old woke up with hair all over the place after a nap, and I made a joke that she had wild crazy hair and she broke down in tears. She thought I was making fun of her and it hurt her feelings. That was a lesson for me, and I learned it real quick.
Now take that same little girl, turn her into a 12 year old in middle school, and her two best friends just told her that her new hairstyle looks like crap. Would you let anyone talk to your daughter that way? Would you continue to let your daughter hang out with someone who constantly brings down her self-esteem? I am going to assume that your answer is NO or HECK NO. So I ask, are you a bully to other women, women you may or may not know? Would you let your daughters or sons hang out with someone who acts like a bully?
The ugly green monster of jealousy is a crazy thing that unfortunately creeps up on all of us, but do you have the courage to check it? About 4 years ago, a friend of mine had an article published about her in one of our popular local magazines about her closet and style. All of a sudden the big ugly green monster started to peek out from under the bed and my first thought was a little bit of jealousy. I thought “how come she was featured; who does she know there to get that article?” And in that moment, I had to subconsciously SLAP myself. In those brief moments I could have lost my mind and said something mean, when in all honesty I was proud of her. So …. I slammed the door on the green jealousy monster and I liked her post with a big ole smile and told her CONGRATULATIONS! Her success was not taking away from my happiness, so why in the world would I try and take away from hers? WOMEN are amazing, the things we can do and grow and juggle. A simple smile from another mom in a grocery store as my child is having a meltdown means the world to me; it’s like she is saying “I feel ya girl, it’s ok” without ever opening her mouth.
In a world that can be so full of hate and trolls, I stand here on my soapbox and beg you to be a shining light of kindness. Don’t let someone else’s opinion of other people shape your opinion of them. Our families are special and they help us survive and they support us, but we also need friends, true “call me anytime and I am there for you” friends. Do not be afraid to check yourself sometimes. We all have those imperfect moments that we are not proud of, so apologize when you are wrong and be there for your friends. Help support them in their decisions, let them grow from their mistakes, help them through the hard times, and congratulate them in the good times. Because I know you would want someone to do the EXACT same things for you.
The makeup you are selling I might be allergic to, or your paintings might not be my taste and your fashion style may not be the same as my own … BUT … you are IMPORTANT to me, so all the things that you are doing and trying are important to me. It takes courage and brains to take something personal and share it with the world and I for one am PROUD OF YOU. So every single thing you do, sell, make or write I will support in any way that I can.
The success of someone else does not take away from your success or happiness!
So tell a fellow woman good job, good luck and help grow the next generation of strong, proud, kind, entrepreneurs, mothers and women. BE A CHEERLEADER!