High Maintenance Disguised as Low Maintenance :: A Mom’s Perspective
I hear a lot of moms talk about those moms. You know the ones. The moms you see in carpool, daycare drop-off, the gym. They look effortlessly put together without trying very hard. Leggings or joggers, a sweatshirt, hair tossed into a messy bun — and somehow they still look gorgeous.
The internet calls it the “clean girl aesthetic.” Or the “low-maintenance” look.
I’m here to tell you that both of those looks are anything but low maintenance.
My first job out of high school was at an aesthetic dermatology practice. I was eighteen, had zero thoughts about what I’d look like as a mom one day, and yet I was constantly in awe of the women around me. They walked into the lobby bare-faced, hair undone, and just… looked beautiful. Glowy. Rested. Effortless.
But here’s the part people don’t see: it wasn’t effortless at all.
These women were in the clinic all the time. Botox, fillers, lasers, chemical peels — you name it. Their “natural” look required appointments, upkeep, and a level of consistency that most people never factor in when they’re comparing themselves in the pickup line.
There’s no secret TikTok Shop product that will give you that look overnight. A solid skincare routine is important, sure — but I promise you the latest serum every influencer swears by isn’t the magic solution. Skincare helps, but it’s not the whole picture.
Now, as a 30-year-old who uses those same tools — Botox, fillers, lasers — I can confirm all of this firsthand. When someone tells me I don’t even look like I need makeup, I’m quick to explain why. When they compliment my eyebrows, I tell them they’re microbladed. When they rave about my skin, I’ll happily show them that my forehead barely moves.
Not because I’m ashamed — but because I don’t want to sell the illusion that this happened “naturally.”
Yes, some people are genetically blessed. That’s real. But generally speaking, the women who look the most low maintenance are often very high maintenance behind the scenes. They’re not rolling out of bed like that by accident.
And if you’re a mom looking at someone else and wondering why you can’t seem to pull it off the same way, let me be clear: you’re not doing anything wrong. You’re just seeing the finished product — not the time, money, or effort that went into it.
Comparison thrives in silence. Honesty takes the power away.
