Perfect Bacon for Exhausted Moms Who Hate to Cook

It is comical that I, a mom free of any culinary ability, would offer up a recipe blog. You should probably not ask me for advice on how to make dinner for your children. Even crockpot meals intimidate me. But thanks to my mom, who has become quite the cook, I have mastered making bacon.

So, if I can make perfect bacon, so can you. Because perfect bacon really is divine.

  1. Buy the good stuff. Thick-cut slices of bacon are where it’s at. Wright’s applewood bacon is my personal fave, although Wrights Hickory Bacon will also do.
  2. Preheat your oven to 400 degrees. Then loudly discourage your toddlers from touching the oven as it heats up.                                    
  3. Get out a baking sheet and cover it with pre-greased foil (Or you could spray Pam on normal foil.)
  4. Place the slices of bacon side by side, barely touching.
  5. Place the bacon-filled baking sheet into the oven and set a timer for 20 minutes. Then go change a diaper, put an unruly toddler in timeout, load half a dishwasher, return an email, and dance party to “We don’t talk about Bruno.”
  6. When the timer buzzes, listen to your toddler scream, “THE BACON IS READY!!!” Check to see if it is perfect or needs an extra two minutes (set timer). The exact time of perfect bacon changes each day. Respect the fickle nature of bacon.
  7. When you have determined the crispiness and color of the bacon cannot be surpassed, take the baking sheet out of the oven. Cover a paper plate with a paper towel and place the bacon onto the plate. (Neatly. Straight, clean lines of bacon only, please.) Take another paper towel and blot the bacon grease.
  8. Resist the urge to immediately feed your children the steaming hot bacon. Four-ish minutes later, enjoy!

In short— bacon/ oven at 400 degrees/ 20-ish minutes.

Bask in the bacon compliments.

Melissa Fleming lives in Prairieville, Louisiana with her husband, Blake, and their three beautiful daughters: Evelyn (4), Clara (2), and Chloe (1). She graduated from LA Tech with a B.A. in journalism and then earned her M.Ed. and Ph.D. in counselor education from UNO. She is the owner of MWF Counseling, LLC. In between seeing clients, chasing toddlers, and holding babies, she enjoys watching Real Housewives and drinking as much caffeinated tea as possible.

1 COMMENT

  1. Finally, I wont have to serve burnt bacon. As a mother of one precious child, Henry, life gets pretty hectic and perfectly cooked bacon is a game changer. Thank you!!
    Ps. I always look forward to your blogs

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