I think we can all agree that parenting and mommyhood can be supremely isolating. Stay at home moms, working moms, work from home moms … so many combos these days and all of them have their own quirks and differences. But in that, I find myself often wondering, am I the only one like me? This question is born out of some frustration and true wonder.
Am I the only full-time working single mom in a demanding career job? Am I the only mom who has a flexible daytime, but not necessarily available for playdates? I can’t tell you how many times I have been asked for a weekday playdate, and I explain AGAIN that I work full-time. “Oh like ACTUALLY full-time?!”
Am I the only mom who is okay with dinnertime TV on a regular basis? Or even worse … okay with not eating with and the same food as my son!??? I am probably during irreparable harm, I know.
Am I the only one who doesn’t do bath time every night?
Am I the only one who travels for work and leaves her child behind at least once a month with an interrupted schedule?
I hope someone out there in mommy blogger reader land is nodding her head right now.
Am I the only one who left their kid rear facing in the car seat well past 2 years old?
Am I the only one who attempted homemade baby food for about two months and gave up?
Am I the only one who has memorized all of the Kid’s Nights in Baton Rouge!?
Am I the only one who had a horrible pediatrician to start forcing me to doubt every decision I make?
Am I alone? Am I the only one like me?
Never in my life have I been more thankful for group texts, iced coffee, and my instinct than since I have become a mom.
Despite all of these supports and affirmations, I still wonder if I will ever find a kindred mom spirit. Will I be left out of all of the mom’s activities because they are during the work day? Will I always be using social media to prove that I do spend quality time with my son despite my busy schedule?
We are all different. Our families all have different challenges. Isolation will continue to be a real part of motherhood. But are we forcing greater isolation by not talking about our personal mom hurdlers?
I have been very vocal with friends, moms or otherwise, about the challenges I face in particular. I am honest about good days and bad days. I earnestly try to reach out to new moms to affirm everything they feel and are experiencing is real despite perception on what parenting “should look like.” As a fully solo parent (read no active co-parent), I haven’t had ONE person to share my experience with … which has allowed me to be open with lots of people about what parenting looks like for me. But in that, I still haven’t found another “mom like me.”
Till then iced coffee, group texts, and this blog will remind me that I might be the only mom I know like me, but I’m NOT alone!